For years now I've heard about the popular movie and bestselling book called
The Secret, which attempt to explain how our minds shape our reality. I've wondered if they might cross into pseudoscience … but hey, who am I to turn down a chance to shape a life that's more fertile, in every sense of the word? Last night, feeling open-minded (and sleepless) I decided to check out the movie finally. The full version is available
here.
Warning:
If you enjoyed The Secret and believe it works for you,
you’ll probably be happier skipping my ranty review.
If you're still reading, I'm going to be honest: it's so much worse than I'd feared. Not only does the movie claim that "like attracts like" (which, in some contexts, I believe) but that it happens "at a level of thought." That’s where they lose me, by stating flatly that "thoughts become things":
"You can have, do, or be—ANYTHING—you want … What kind of a house do you want to live in? Do you want to be a millionaire? What kind of a business do you want to have? Do you want more success? … The Secret is the Law of Attraction. Everything that's coming into your life, you are attracting into your life … Your life is a physical manifestation of the thoughts that go on in your head."
Have you noticed how people who promote these ideas seem especially fixated on attracting
stuff (money and objects)? They call it "prosperity" and "abundance," but we all know what that means. I once listened to a meditation titled something generic like "Drawing in the Good," but what it actually involved was picturing money and diamonds dropping from the sky. As the narrator got more and more into it, her voice rose from a soothing meditative drone toward orgasmic levels of delight. I was doubled over laughing. So I guess it did improve my life, just not in quite the way she advertised.
In this film, look at the images that are shown. A woman lusts after a necklace in a store window, and a little boy gawks at a bike, while the speaker promises, "When you think of the things that you want, and you focus on them with all of your attention, the Law of Attraction will give you what you want every time."
Do you want that baby and happy family like I do?? OK, then let's get down to business! How exactly does the Law of Attraction work? Although the references to other laws (like gravity) and quotes from Einstein help create a science-y vibe, most of the experts in this film are identified with titles like Philosopher, Visionary, Author, Therapist, and Feng Shui Consultant. Here an Entrepreneur, Metaphysician, and others explain how it works:
"Every thought has a frequency. We can measure a thought, and so if you're thinking that thought over and over and over again, or you're imagining in your mind having that brand-new car, having the money that you need … If you imagine what that looks like, you're emitting that frequency on a consistent basis … Thoughts are sending out that magnetic signal that is drawing the parallel back to you … It is no more difficult to attract, on a scientific level, something that we consider huge to something we consider infinitesimally small ... See yourself living in abundance, and you will attract it. It always works, it works every time, with every person."
These last lines are spoken over video of a male model dressing in a snazzy suit and climbing into a limo. There's also footage of mansions, tanned people on holiday, and yes, money falling from the sky.
So if it's this simple, and if it works EVERY TIME, why are you still injecting your poor butt with hormones and spending your limo money on OPKs? The problem is that most people focus on what they DON'T want, so that's exactly what keeps showing up in their lives:
"The Law of Attraction doesn't care whether you perceive something to be good or bad, or whether you don't want it or whether you do want it … Most people have a goal of getting out of debt. That'll keep you in debt forever. Whatever you're thinking about, you'll attract. You'll say, 'But it’s get out of debt.' I don’t care if it's get out or get in; if you're thinking debt, you're attracting debt."
Did you catch that part about how you've attracted all your problems? Let's make it super-duper clear:
"Everything that's around you right now in your life, including the things you're complaining about, you've attracted. Now I know at first blush that's going to be something that you hate to hear. You're going to immediately say, 'I didn't attract the car accident…' [or] whatever it happens to be that you're complaining about. And I'm here to be a little bit in your face and to say, 'Yes, you DID attract it.'"
I don't know about you, but I'm ready to attract some better stuff. It may be too hard to monitor our thoughts all the time. But thoughts cause emotions, and emotions are easier to monitor and change. How to change them? Whatever makes you feel good, just keep doing that thing!
"When you're feeling down, do you know that you can change it like that? Put on a beautiful piece of music. Start singing; that'll change your emotion. Or think of something beautiful—think of a baby! And dwell on it, really keep that thought in your mind, block everything out but that thought."
Block everything out of my mind except babies? *CHOKE* Why did I NEVER THINK OF THAT?
Of course, you can think about other good things that are less complicated than babies, like your pets. The key is to use all of your senses to imagine—no,
believe—that you already have what you want. You can post pictures on a "vision board" and write lists in the present tense about the great things
you've longed for with all your heart for years now the universe is manifesting effortlessly. "It’s you placing your order with the universe. It’s really that easy."
Oh look, a procedure:
1.
Ask the universe very clearly for what you want.
2.
Believe that it's already yours.
3.
Receive it. If you haven't received it yet, repeat Step 2 until you get it right.
If you insist on knowing more about what's going on between Steps 2 and 3, then sorry, you'll have to learn quantum physics. Maybe then you'll understand how "The mind is actually shaping the very thing that's being perceived." If you don't have the time to read
metaphysics with your feet up in the stirrups, the short version is this: everything in the universe is energy, and so we're all connected. If those ideas make you feel warm and fuzzy, but you still don't understand how they'll make you pregnant, that doesn't mean you should reject them. Don't be a hater. After all, many things around us (like electricity) work despite our lack of understanding.
How do we know that the Law of Attraction works? We have anecdotes! The ones that bothered me most were the health-related stories—and we're not just talking about a mind-body connection here. We're not just acknowledging that worry may raise blood pressure or the placebo effect may do some actual good. Instead, the film mentions a miraculous cancer cure, kidneys that "regenerate," and so on. Whether these cures resulted from The Law or something else, I’m happy for these people. But the flip side is that they're pointing a finger at me. They're blaming my physical symptoms on such medical problems as my lack of love. That baby I miscarried, whose pre-transfer embryo photo I kept next to my bed for months? Apparently I just didn't love him/her enough.
Diseases are "all the result of one thing: stress. When you put enough stress on a chain, you put enough strain on a system, one of the links breaks … Our physiology creates disease to give us feedback, to let us know we have an imbalanced perspective, we're not loving, and we're not grateful … Disease cannot live in a body that's in a healthy emotional state."
In other words, YOU caused your infertility. But don't feel guilty about it, because guilt will just make it worse. Quick! Think happy thoughts about babies instead! I mean, NO … think about your dog! Damn it, why can't you just relax?
Not only do our negative thoughts and emotions wreak havoc in our own lives, but they ripple out into the world. If you care about issues like poverty, it may be better to visualize abundance than to fight for (and therefore focus on and feel unpleasant feelings about) actual people in need. Fighting things is so
negative. "The anti-war movement creates more war. The anti-drug movement has actually created more drugs." If we really want to help, we should focus less on the problems and more on the solutions.
To be fair, this is where
The Secret finally starts making some sense to me. As the saying goes, "It’s better to light a candle than to curse the darkness." Of course, this idea is nothing new. Most of the ideas in
The Secret, including the ones I agree with, aren't new, like the concept that happiness depends on attitudes as well as circumstances.
Believe it or not, my intention here was not just to blast this movie. On the verge of a very important and stressful month, I sincerely want to consider what I can and can't control, and how to use that control in the most effective, least neurotic ways. That's why this post is going to require a Part 2, which will be much
less bitter more positive. To be continued...
