The Zen of My Clinic Commute

With each cycle I spend commuting there, the far-away clinic seems less far away.

I've learned how early to leave home (by 5AM), which route to take (the one that's longer but less congested), which lanes to avoid (the ones that end abruptly, and the ones where the buses hang out), etc. I've found emergency bathrooms and alternate routes. Of course, I know most of the clinic staff and their routines, too. It's a relief, because the more automatic these things become, the less space they need to take up in my brain.

Today I thought back to how very close I came to ruling out this clinic after my first consultation there. That first day, the round-trip drive took five hours. It was also the day that I saw the boldest move I've ever seen in traffic, anywhere. Picture a big downtown intersection. Two lanes are waiting at a red light to turn left. Then a woman turns left from the far-right lane (illegal), through the red light (illegal), to make a U-turn (illegal), all while blabbing on her hand-held cell phone (yep, that's now illegal, too). I shook my head and said, "Forget it. No way am I doing this every day!"

Now here I am starting a fourth cycle there. As I drive down busy but now-familiar streets, I think of the women whose clinic commutes involve plane flights or even passports. Mostly I think about the goal: being a mother ... someday ... if I'm lucky. The small stuff has a way of sorting itself out.

Yes, every drive has the usual irritations opportunities for practicing mindfulness. Really. I've been trying to say some standard loving-kindness phrases (May you be happy, May you be healthy, May you be safe, and so on) to any drivers who annoy me. It works surprisingly well. It short-circuits that instinctive—and totally pointless—Oh no you don't; I'll show YOU response.

If I can't get through the phrases without extra commentary ("May you be safe ... you asshole, because clearly you need help with that!"), I start over again. I haven't had to do it more than two or three times yet.

If all else fails, there's bubble wrap!
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