Silent Night

There's not much to say. What I've been doing this fall has been very distracting (on purpose) but not meaningful (also on purpose). I can't do meaningful now, not quite yet. After the years of TTC, I can't keep forcing myself to focus on things that hurt. So there have been distractions...

And then there are nights like tonight: snow falling, making the city quiet and still. Christmas lights. Memories of a night like this two years ago.

You know how, when someone writes a brokenhearted post, and there's nothing to say because they've just said it all, people sometimes simply write "Abiding with you" or words to that effect? I've felt your presence, abiding with me these past two years, and I'm thankful.

Tonight I'll try to give myself that same gift: turn down the volume on all the junk I've been using to fill up my mind, and just abide with what's left.